To
begin with, a common element among many of us is “retirement.” Retirement plays a big role in the daily lives of most of us -
I know it does in mine. No more alarm
clock getting us up at some ungodly hour to shave, have a quick cup of coffee
and a glance at a newspaper before darting out the door. OK, some of us also checked our email and
social networking sites - but generally didn’t have enough time to do anything
with them. Some of us are even too
old-fartish to have been distracted by such things.
On
a typical day during retirement we get up leisurely when we wish. The coffee maker is on a timer because we
aren’t really awake - even though we’re ambling about - until 10:30 or so. No need to be. No sense in shaving.
Nothing on our calendar requires it.
I generally run a brush through my hair so that if a neighbor sees me as
I gather the newspaper, they won’t be frightened to death. I happened, one morning, to glace in the
mirror at myself uncombed. It’s not a
sight I want to inflict on anyone.
Often
the decision as whether or not to change from our nightclothes to something
more presentable is the toughest choice we’ll make all day. This is quite a let down for some of us who
are used to making decisions involving gobs of money each day. Throwing on a bathrobe suffices for many
purposes. When the postal worker brings
me the latest postage-due copy of “Old Farts Gazette” he/she expects to see me
in my bathrobe. Anything else would
risk a 911 call. But, most of us do
take a shower every 3 or 4 days whether we need it or not. Some veneer of civilized behavior is
necessary.
Breakfast
is a habit I broke in college and have never seen reason to resume. Without eating I could lie in bed until 7:55
and still make my 8:00 class in “Western Philosophy” during which I could get
some more shut-eye. (I was a science major.) So without the necessity of a morning
repast the day moves right along.
In
retirement the time immediately after coffee and the newspaper is critical –
there’s another day to face.
Suicide? I generally decide, “No.” Before retirement, this time was a
no-brainer. You were on the job and
there were, by definition, crises - otherwise it wouldn’t be a job. Crises gave you something to think about,
problems to be solved, the need to draw upon your expertise, strut your
stuff. Now all of that is gone. The only problem is how to generate a
problem to solve.
Whether
you do some gardening today or tomorrow matters not an iota and no one thinks
more or less of you for doing or not doing it.
“It’s nice to see the old fart
out and about. “ All of us
garden. Now granted at one extreme, you
can get together with others, generate a club, build a tree house, put out a
sign that says “Members Only,” create labels such as “Greenest Thumb” and take
pains to learn to recognize a pansy from a yucca. But take it from me; the earth was probably at its best,
plant-wise, long before there were gardeners.
But I like to garden when my hips, knees, elbows, back, sinuses, eyes,
neck, shoulders, ankles, spleen and wrists cooperate. It’s pretty easy to convince yourself that the spot you plant the
hydrangea has world significance.
Walking
is a great way to kill time, if not yourself, but one has to be careful about
the weather. In the summer you have to
walk early or late - certainly not in the heat of mid-day. In the winter, mid-day sometimes is
tolerable and the ideal time to walk, if there’s no snow or ice. If it’s raining, you probably want to skip walking
as well. Also find a route with low
traffic. Often if you drive 20 or 30
miles you can find a city or state park specifically designed for walkers. It can be fun to walk in the park if there
are no bicycle riders around – or mean dogs – or gnats. But, beware; walking can make you feel old.
Golf
is a favorite hobby among many retirees.
Not me. I tried it a few times
when I was less old but, at that time, I couldn’t afford losing the balls. Plus, I was working so the times available
to me were limited. On a beautiful
Saturday morning a few thousand people waited to tee off. But, I confess, I think the real reason I’ve
avoided golf is I don’t see much sense to the game. Some claim its good exercise, but it seems as if the most
exercise is carrying a putter from the golf cart to the green – maybe twenty
yards and a putter isn’t very heavy.
Often people don’t even have to carry the club back because they’ve
thrown it into the lake. But, beware;
if golf is exercise, exercise can make you feel old.
Others
laud the game because it gets them outdoors to enjoy nature. I find I can do that as well sitting on my
patio drinking a pinot noir while watching birds at my feeder. And I save a lot of money because I don’t
have to buy new putters. Some pinot
noirs are pretty inexpensive.
© 2014 Lester C. Welch
© 2014 Lester C. Welch
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